INCREMENTAL CHANGE

This is not about grand gestures. You've let her feel alone, that is something that you can control. Apologize, be sincere, be realistic.

Tell her you hear her.

You don't want her to feel lonely.

We are compatible. I just got complacent thinking that everything was ok. I honestly had no idea how bad it gotten in her mind.

I can make immediate changes that will help with that. And then, we work on the other stuff as we go forward.

There's nothing to lose by staying, and WE have everything to gain. If there's even a tiny sliver of doubt about leaving,
I really think the best thing to do is to stay and try, at least for a week to see if we can move on from some of this.

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MY BETTER HALF

I really thought (still think) this is it for me. I can't picture my life without her in it or myself with anyone else.
The thought of her leaving is like tearing myself in half.

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LATE NIGHTS

Not coming and bed all those nights was the problem to fix that solves 90% of out issues at home. How can she feel loved when
you're not there holding her at night? If she agrees to stay, you get your ass in bed and there for her!

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MY LOVE, I CARE

I need to be better about showing how much I care about her and about us. I care so much, I can't believe things are this bad.
It can be fixed, we just need to trust and support each other. Couples go through these things all the time, if we can work through it,
we'll be stronger on the other side.

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MY LOVE, GO TO HELL

I knew you were a little impulsive,
but I never thought you'd be so wreckless with our love

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LONG HOURS

Success felt good. It felt good to be recognized company wide, it felt good to be acknowledged.

I worked and worked to try and maintain that and I feel so stupid for putting so much effort into working all those hours on
something that doesn't even matter when the one things that matters to me was right in front of me pulling away slowly. I got my
priorities mixed up and I'm so sorry. I never wanted to make you feel so alone. You say you made a mistake by not communicating
sooner, I made a mistake by not prioritizing you. Let's just forgive each other and forgive ourselves and move forward. We can get through this.

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What's left?

This isn't about you being my whole world and trying to burden you with being my sole outlet.

But you had all my love. You took it with you and threw it away.

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INCREMENTAL CHANGE

This is not about grand gestures. You've let her feel alone, that is something that you can control. Apologize, be sincere, be realistic.

Tell her you hear her.

You don't want her to feel lonely.

We are compatible. I just got complacent thinking that everything was ok. I honestly had no idea how bad it gotten in her mind.

I can make immediate changes that will help with that. And then, we work on the other stuff as we go forward.

There's nothing to lose by staying, and WE have everything to gain. If there's even a tiny sliver of doubt about leaving,
I really think the best thing to do is to stay and try, at least for a week to see if we can move on from some of this.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MY BETTER HALF

I really thought (still think) this is it for me. I can't picture my life without her in it or myself with anyone else.
The thought of her leaving is like tearing myself in half.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

LATE NIGHTS

Not coming and bed all those nights was the problem to fix that solves 90% of out issues at home. How can she feel loved when
you're not there holding her at night? If she agrees to stay, you get your ass in bed and there for her!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MY LOVE, I CARE

I need to be better about showing how much I care about her and about us. I care so much, I can't believe things are this bad.
It can be fixed, we just need to trust and support each other. Couples go through these things all the time, if we can work through it,
we'll be stronger on the other side.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MY LOVE, GO TO HELL

I knew you were a little impulsive,
but I never thought you'd be so wreckless with our love

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

LONG HOURS

Success felt good. It felt good to be recognized company wide, it felt good to be acknowledged.

I worked and worked to try and maintain that and I feel so stupid for putting so much effort into working all those hours on
something that doesn't even matter when the one things that matters to me was right in front of me pulling away slowly. I got my
priorities mixed up and I'm so sorry. I never wanted to make you feel so alone. You say you made a mistake by not communicating
sooner, I made a mistake by not prioritizing you. Let's just forgive each other and forgive ourselves and move forward. We can get through this.

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WEIGHT, NOT WAITING

And when you sit alone, thinking, you'll know. The weight of not waiting will be heavy and you'll realize the damage you've done.

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HERE, BUT NOT HERE

Remind yourself, co-existence is not a relationship.

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WHEN IT'S NOT FOOD YOU'RE HUNGRY FOR

Starved in every sense of the word.

One day after the next. You'll think, "was it this quiet yesterday?"

And somehow the days that follow won't get better but worse.

And you say nothing, and I say nothing, and soon the silence is all we have becuase what else is there?

Cat got your tongue?

Oh you're not hungry?

Actually, darling, I am. I'm starving. For just a little bit of your attention.

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IGNORANCE, IT WAS BLISS

24 hours. 24 hours in a day. 24 hours in your mind. 24 hours of painful awareness.

Kitchen. Empty

LIving room. Empty

Life. Empty.

There's a hole. The size of which can't be filled because there isn't enough of me left to replace the parts your took from me.

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WHAT KEEPS COMING UP

That same thought you had at the end of last night, it's still there in the morning. Lying next to you. Looking over your shoulder while you brush your teeth.

It doesn't do anything anymore. It's just there, always.

"Don't fight it." they say. So you don't.

And it consumes you.

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IT'S NOT BEING ALONE

It's the reality of the situation. The one minute there, next minute gone.

Were you real? Did I live with a stranger for two years?

And now, silence.

It's not being alone that keeps me awake. It's the feeling that something is missing.

Something I've forogotten or will forget but don't want to.

Like a limb torn off, the physical separation does nothing inside the mind.

And yet, you don't seem phased by any of it. Or are you?

I wouldn't know.

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Crocs

A package I wasn't expecting. Not because I hadn't order anything but because when I checked the address [ ]

Remember, darling? When you first moved in? The amount of Amazon boxes that started showing up to the house.

Cute, I thought. She's decorating the house a bit. And then one closet is full of facemasks, another with hair products, the dining room turned into a sewing shop. Pins on the floor jabbing in my feet, yarn everywhere and yet...cute.

That's how I knew. Your mess was never a mess to me.

So one last package arrives,

MY LOVE,
don't leave

Working through issues makes us straonger. Why leave when we could be together? Why run when there's no finish line?

Just stay, my love.

Out in the ether

mylovedontleave.com

We built something real

"I'll do better"